SAQ

Surprise, surprise! I enjoyed writing the FAQ which I placed, for now, at the bottom of this blog. I had never written an FAQ before and it's, in fact, quite a bit like writing dialogue. Doh!

Actually, umm, well, let's say it CAN be.

However, I decided instantly to invent a new genre here, since I'm playing Ricciotto Canudo and I already predicted that blogging will soon become the Eighth Art. Any art deserves its own techniques and stuff, and for now there is ample space for us to experiment and try to create new Blog features and genres.

So, starting from an old device used in website design (having fun yet?), the "FAQ", or the "Frequently Asked Questions", I am going to now discover before your widened eyes a new way of writing shit on a blog. I'll coin the term (drumroll, please!) "SAQ", short for "Suddenly Asked Questions", or for "Self Asked Questions", if you prefer. In which the author asks himself various questions and answers them.

I don't need to remind you how much more fun reading dialogue is, as opposed to toiling through descriptions (unless these are sickeningly masterful, such as Tom Robbins', or dead-on, such as Tom Wolfe's).

What is the point of all this, you ask? (or I pretend you do, if you get my drift)

Dialogue makes text flow easily and airily on the computer screen, causing the eye to pleasantly glide about, allowing time for the mind to rhythmically switch perspectives, in that kind of interior dance that we all know and like. At the same time, its author is...

No, wait, this is all wrong. Lemme test drive this SAQ concept.

Q: "SAQ's? You're trippin'!"

A: "No, I'm not. It's all about your EYES and your MIND, and it forces the AUTHOR to simplify his thoughts!"

Q:"How are the reader's eyes involved?"

A:"They glide easier between dialogue lines, everything flows better, and tiny breaks in both time and space are created: rhythm."

Q:"Why do you need rhythm and breaks?"

A:"To give the reader's mind a cue to switch perspectives. To jump from one partner's shoes into the other's, while dancing!"

Q:"One's mind clones itself and dances about in one's head?"

A:"Yeah, as the author... plays the tune. "

Q:"Told ya, you're trippin'... And how is writing dialogue helping the author?"

A:"By forcing him to keep everything entertaining and dynamic. To pace information, to give it away in human doses. To fully clarify and simplify ideas in his own head, first."

Q:"Mmmh..."

A:"Plus... As he writes dialogue, the author is himself forced to switch perspectives!"

Q:"I see, he examines the issues closely from different angles, at odds with each other. Some kind of maieutical masturbation?"

A:"I thought I was the only one who listened to that song too many times! Anyway: when writing description, the author gets sidetracked... Because he can! The mind of the poor reader has no choice but to follow... or to put the book down."

Q:"The author gets sidetracked, of course, by his own verbal fireworks and desire to elaborate, use fancy words, long sentences, figures of speech, he doesn't have to limit himself to how real people talk. And all that risks of putting off the reader..."

A:"Yeah."

Q:"But on a blog, usually an author writes what you call "description", while the "dialogue" follows the post, in the "comments" section."

A:"That's the interactive side of a blog, a different story. That's more like reviews for books or people talking about a movie, or interacting with the author in press conferences, only more easily accessible. And that's why blogs are successful, in part.

But all I'm saying is that blog POSTS themselves could be in a DIALOGUE format! More exciting, why not? Hence, (drum roll, please!) the SAQ!"

Q:"OK, OK, just cut it out with that drum roll!"

A:"Didn't you notice how fun it is when people post tidbits of YM logs? You swallow those up, don't you?"

Q:"Yeah, but that's voyeurism."

A:"Still, a designed dialogue works better, don't you think?"

Q:"Hey, you switched, now you're doing the asking and I'm answering!"

A: "That's OK, I'm not lecturing you, we're having a dialogue".

Q:"So, your SAQs would be pieces designed as dialogues, like this one?"

A:"Only much better, hopefully. And shorter."

Q:"Hmm. Shouldn't you at least give me a name? "

A:"..."

Q:"And create an entire persona for me?"

A:"Turn you into a character?"

Q:"You are one, why couldn't I be, I'm entertaining you here!"

A:"So many people come out on blogs displaying who they are in real life! Why do you think I could get away with being several personas at once, on the same blog?"

Q:"Matt Weatherford became "the Filthy Critic" and he created a nephew to write film criticism when he didn't feel like it. Why can't I be Someone, too?"

A:"Matt isn't chatting with his imaginary nephew!.. But then again, so what! Only... I'm worried that once I start this, who knows where it will end up. Next thing you know, the moment I stop liking you, I'll kill you. Or I'll create yet another character, or several, to use at my whim, and so on."

Q:"Until this whole blog becomes a friggin' script in and by itself, you mean?!"

A:"Right. "

Q:"So, what's wrong with that? Innovate! But think me over first. Make me a nice arc. "

A: "I'll see. Don't push your luck, fella! Gotta go now."

Ricciotto spreads his wings and flies out the window, watched in awe by the little birds in the pinetree outside.